I don’t know much about the Catholic Church’s internal politics and policymaking, which means I don’t know much about their new pope. From what little I’ve heard, it sounds like he might do well enough.

Part of me is disappointed, though, that Trump didn’t follow through on his brain fart and try to run for pope himself. He might even have gotten it; stranger things have happened, like his election as president.

Why would I be disappointed?

• The more time the Assclown spends on the other side of the world, the better.

• Institutional self-reflection can be healthy on occasion, and the elevation of a pope so corrupt (in several senses of the word) he makes Roderic de Borgia look like Sir Galahad would have prompted some reflection.

• There’s some overlap between people who think Catholocism is Satanic and people who think Jesus literally guides Trump’s pen when he signs executive orders, and it would have been fun watching their eyes bulge out.

…no, I’m not Catholic. Why do you ask?

Actually, I have a better idea: Trump should run for Dalai Lama instead.

• Tibet is even farther away from his current victims than Vatican City.

• We know just how well he’d do with the whole issue of how much control the Chinese government haas over the position.

• It’d be even funnier watching his pseudo-Christian superfans’ heads explode when they try to process the idea of their anointed god-king being a Buddhist tulku.

• Actual Tibetan Buddhists – already primed for the possibility of a “fake” Dalai Lama by the governmental-control debate mentioned above – would reject him en masse.

• And as a bonus, we’d get to see how long it’d take Trump to realize that the current Dalai Lama is still alive.